Dads Make a Difference

Research shows that the more involved dads are, the better the child does in school. When dad is involved, whether he lives in the home or not:
1. Children learn more.
2. Perform better in school.
3. Exhibit healthier behavior.
4. Fewer behavioral problems.
5. Higher level of sociability.
6. Boosts children's confidence.
7. Children enjoy school more.

Building successful partnerships with dads.
The time to build long-lasting teacher/parent relationships is when the children are in Pre-K through Middle School. Getting dads involved should be an ongoing process and not a one time a year event.  The best way to get dads involved is to plan father events and activities throughout the year. A derby race, Dad and Me night, a reading program with dads, a pancake breakfast, donuts for dad. And, remember, the best way to get dads to attend is simple: Ask! Don't send a general flyer either, send home material that asks dad to attend.

Educate dads on the importance of their involvement.
Dads want to know what impact their involvement has on their children and families. Provide information on a regular basis in formats directed to dads: postcards, posters, letters from their children telling them how they love dads to be involved, tips on ways to get involved from home. Tell real stories of how dad involvement is making a difference in children's lives, sometimes one statistic or major point can go a long way. Dads want the best for their kids, so tell how they can contribute.

Changing the education culture in the home.
It is so vital to get dads involved not only at the school, but in the home. Most of the time when the word school or homework comes about in conversation it's equated to mom. We need to change that culture in the home to include dad. Helping with homework, reading a book with their children, speaking of the importance of good grades and good behavior, setting standards, voicing expectations, teaching manners, these are a few ways for dad to get involved in the home that will impact their children and families in positive ways.

It's Hard for Parents to Stay Involved at the High School Level.
Parent involvement is much greater from Pre-K through middle school. There is a tremendous decline in parent involvement once teens enter high school. Hey, no one is blaming parents here! What we are saying is that it is a fact that parent involvement decreases. Maybe some of it is natural, we want to let our teens have a little distance, be more independent and grow up. But the truth is, teenagers actually need more parental involvement, not less through the high school years. School administrators and teachers need to be more creative to engage parents in effective ways. Volunteering and being involved looks different at this level. We aren't necessarily needed to help students read and do simple math in the classrooms.

Ways for Dad to Get Involved at the High School.
Dads can discuss academic choices, help the teen discover their talents and skills. Dads can get involved in something their teen cares about, such as, the marching band pit crew, chaperone field trips, help fill water coolers for the football or soccer team, help build sets for the drama team, and dozens of other ideas. Yes, there's plenty of "guy stuff" that needs to be done; it's there waiting for dads! Dads should be supportive and help teenagers through independence, maturity, collegiate choices, and helping the teen recognize their talents. Dads need to attend their teens academic and sporting events, parent/teacher conferences, concerts, and more. Be the anchor at home and continue to help develop sons and daughters into healthy, educated and loving adults. Don't let yourself fall into dropping out of your sons/daughters academic lives.  The more connected, supportive and involved that you are in your teens lives will increase their chances of attending college and graduating with a degree. Stay connected to your teen; they are counting on you!

Resources to Be an Involved Dad
National Fatherhood Initiative (NFI)
All Pro Dad
Fathers.com
Fathers' World
A Call to Commitment: Fathers' Involvement in Children's Learning
National PTA Bulletin Boards - Read what PTA members are saying about Dad Involvement.
National Center for Education Statistics - Read Father Involvement in Their Children's Schools.

Three for Me surveyed dads in 2004 (16,046 respondents) and asked them how parent groups and schools could reach them better, and what types of activities they wanted to be involved in at school and with their children. We recommend all schools to survey the parents. Target specific questions to dad. Ask him what types of activities interest him. Ask him about his talents or special skills. Ask dad the best way to contact him.

Here's what we learned through our dads survey:

1. Dads didn't join our parent group or get involved at school because, "they weren't asked and/or they didn't have time."
   • Write this down, it's KEY, men told us they will make time to be involved at school if they are given a specific job, their skills are utilized, and the time and expectation of the activity is provided.
   • Dads told us "being asked" meant that a specific invitation should be sent home to them; not a general flyer and volunteer sign-up forms.
   • The Three for Me promise works great. It's specific; three hours and non-threatening. Signing the promise card, "opens the door to the school." There is a beginning and an end in sight.
   • Ask them on a volunteer sign-up form what skills they are willing to share. Many dads were interested in participating in a career and hobby night.
2. If dads did join our parent group it was mostly because the wife signed them up, or the child brought home information.
   • Dads are more likely to join the parent group if the wife signs him up, so utilize that information and create a sign up option for "parents," to sign up as a team for a specific membership fee. On your membership form, ask moms to sign up dad, too. Don't just offer individual membership sign up lines.
   • Dads were more willing to sign up for the parent group at an event. So, set up a membership table in a key place, or tie-in membership with an event. For example, at a fun fair, "Men, join the parent group tonight and get two free tickets at any fun fair game."
3. Dads told us that we needed to publicize events better to them.
   • They want male oriented publicity. What's that? A postcard sent home with the child, that invites "Dad." Take time to cut out the invitation in the shape of the event, for example, a baseball, football, car, sporting ticket shape, etc.
   • Dads said go after us, invite us, we care about our kids and want to participate.
4. They told us they wanted events that appealed to men.
   • Ask men what type of events 'they want' in your survey. For example, dads at our school wanted a pinewood derby race. They would help their child assemble, design, paint and race a derby car. They asked for lots of "big" trophies. Dads wanted to race, too, and we let them. Dads asked for an evening of hands-on building with their children. So we created "Build-It! Night." A new event was created called "Dad and Me." Dads had a picnic dinner with their children, and then participated in a hands-on building event sponsored by Home Depot. They provided build-it yourself kits and every child wore a small Home Depot apron. The invitations were designed with dads in mind: card stock in the shape of a hammer with the event information; addressed to D.A.D.S. (Dads Are Doing Something). Feel free to use any of these ideas.
5. Dads told us they were less likely to volunteer again if they were the only dad present and they were more likely to get involved if another man asked them.
   • Start a dads group or men's group at your school with a couple of men that are willing. Give them the task to personally invite other men for specific activities. Hey, remember this rule...women cannot start the men's group!! Get a couple of involved dads and ask them if they have interest in starting the group. Let them take the lead and start inviting other men.
   • Watch this group of men GROW.
   • Men are problem solvers. They might put together a golf tournament to raise money to replace playground equipment. They might start a Fix-It Day to make minor repairs in teachers classrooms. They might start a "Dads Club," or "Dads Reading Club" and read to students in classrooms and their own children more often at home.
6. Dads said they liked events that included the entire family.
   • Dads want worthwhile, fun and enriching time with their families. Create fun family events that everyone at your school can participate in. For example, Family Movie Nights, Fun Fairs, Game Nights, Math & Science Nights.
   • Try to budget these family events into your plan so that parents don't always have to "pay" to participate.
7. Dads said they were more likely to volunteer versus chair a committee.
   • Most dads told us they would be willing to be a volunteer for a short term activity. Understand and accept that! Make the connection and you'll get more, as the value is realized. It's KEY, that dads feel there is value in what they are doing. They like results and get satisfaction in seeing the task accomplished.
   • Challenge dads to join their child for lunch once per grading period. That's a great start.
8. Dads will come to meetings, but they want to handle business and not socialize for an hour.
   • We have to take a serious look at how parent group and other parent group meetings are handled. Let's be honest. Don't general meetings and executive board meetings sometimes turn into a social hour? The best of us can get sidetracked.
   • Dads are more willing to attend a parent group meeting with other men or if invited by other men.
   • Avoid the pitfalls of bad meetings by having a printed agenda, keep control of the meetings, and move the meeting along at a good pace. Keep people on topic.
   • Do you greet people at the door? Ask several of your board members to stand at the entrance and welcome and thank parents that show up. Have a table set up with handouts and your agenda. Start your meeting on time and end it on time. And remember that refreshments are nice, once in a while.
   • Don't gauge the success of your parent group by the attendance at your general meetings! If a parent can come to either your meeting or an event after school with their child, which would you prefer them to attend? You shouldn't have to think about that one.